The Truth Behind this AME College Student
William Cordier, Connectional Young Peoples Division (YPD) Evaluations Committee Chairperson
Coming up in the African Methodist Episcopal Church, a common theme in our Zion concerns young adults/millennial AMEs. Two questions are commonly asked: “Why are we losing our young people?” and “How can we retain college students in our YPD?” Every young adult and YPDer in the church has heard them asked on several occasions. Even though I cannot answer these questions, I can give my perspective and experience. For a bit of a prelude, I want to give you my brief backstory. From 2013-2015, I was a Conference YPD President; I learned a lot, but I was not satisfied, so at 16, I became the 5th District YPD President in 2015. I remained in office until 2019.
There are three components to my experience. First, learning and growing during a time of transition. Second, experiencing pain and hurt from the AME Church while in school. Third, trying to learn who I was as a person, just like every other college student.
In the fall of 2017, I began my college journey at Drake University; I was already two years into my position as the 5th District YPD President. Things started to change when there was a shift in leadership in our district. With a new Episcopal YPD Director, many changes were in place, and I had a hard time adjusting to the transition. The increased expectations were draining me, even though I could handle the workload between YPD and school. It was draining me to the point where I knew I had to choose between one soon. Eventually, however, I became more comfortable in my position, and the people around me saw it too.
I liked that people seemed to respect me more because I was growing in my role, but I struggled in school. My grade point average was staggering at around 2.2, and I felt like I was barely making it, and with one slip-up, I would drown. As selfish as it sounds, being a leader in transition was causing my personal life to crumble.
Another transition for me was the first time my father did not receive a pastoral assignment. This leads me to the second component: the pain and hurt I endured from this event. I remember this Annual Conference like it was yesterday. While my father was pastoring, there were rumors about our church foreclosing, which seemed fake. But, when I talked to my father, I learned it was true. Shady things had happened with people the church trusted to pay the church’s bills. Yet, it seems there is a belief in our church that when situations like this happen, the pastor is automatically at fault, and I get it. After knowing the truth, the rumors you hear of people degrading your name, making false rumors, and having the nerve to say my father stole money got to me.
Watching the Commissioning Service was a wreck, hearing all the names of pastors getting their assignment to a church while my father did not. I remember all the cold stares from YPDers and laypeople, everyone in the hall who believed they knew exactly what had happened. Those stares lasted until we left the facility. I would receive phone calls from friends across the district asking if this was true, and our Planning Meeting would be just as awkward. As a point of transparency, I was angry; I was a 19-year-old boy who was expected to keep his composure when the AME Church gashed my family. We had general concerns, as we lost a big chunk of income, which challenged how our family would pay its bills–and my tuition. Instead of letting the discomfort I felt out, I bottled it up and kept it pushing because I had to, but the pain and hurt were very real.
And through all this, I still had to figure out who William Cordier is. I would always joke with friends that I could call college “Middle School 2.0” because, at first, it can be pretty awkward, you are making a huge transition in life, and as a person, you are going through changes mentally and physically. All this time before college, I was always a busy person. I never had to sit down and answer the tough questions for myself. Being in school forced that, particularly during my last two years of school, which was when I finally stepped down as the 5th District YPD President. At this point, I was burnt out, hurt, and trying to get through school.
I started working out again and isolating myself a lot. I was on the path of self-growth, but it started rough. I had no direction. I had built up all this pressure and had little to no patience for the process. Then, a couple of months into this process, I received a phone call from Director Ringgold and my Episcopal Director informing me that I had been appointed to the position of Evaluations Committee Chairperson. Even though I thought I was excited, I was lying to people around me and, more importantly, lying to myself. I thought I was ready to step back in, but I was wrong. I was not fully engaged, was not getting responsibilities done on time, and was distant.
The next thing I knew, COVID happened, and as everything shut down around me, my life was forced to slow down. It was frustrating being back home, but it was just what I needed. I was able to start the process of healing and growth organically, and that is exactly what happened. Fast forward to May 2021, I had just graduated from Drake University. My parents wanted me to move home, but I refused to do that because I wanted to apply the lessons I learned and continue the path of the man I am becoming. Recently, I started my career as an independent insurance agent with Globe Life Family Heritage. Mentally and physically, I felt great, and I finally felt rejuvenated enough to serve in the YPD and the AME Church.
From my story, here are some takeaways for the common question of “Why are we losing our young people?” and “How can we retain college students in our YPD?” First, I challenge older and middle-aged AME clergy and laypeople to radiate kindness and love to avoid imparting the church hurt that will push them away. Second, I challenge the AME Church to be about its people by growing, being open-minded to changes in society, and reviving our Zion so our young people do not outgrow the AME Church. Finally, I challenge our AME Church family to let college students grow organically and shower them with nurturing and spiritual love. I promise those children you sent off to college will come back to the church as abled adults, ready to take the mantle.
